Does the world ever feel like a place where everyone knows everything about everyone else? This was a big week for that sensation: A reality show contestant under constant watch said goodbye, a Mad Men's secret came out, and a pop princess poked fun at her oversaturation. Maybe we all need to take some advice from Don Draper. Welcome to Top Moments, limit-your-exposure edition.
7. Best Hug-Out: As fragile, recovering meth addict Johnny begins his red carpet dress on Project Runway, the pressure gets to him - so much that he leaves the work room to keep from freaking out. But Tim Gunn puts on his therapist hat and consoles the weeping designer. There's nothing like a big hug and words of wisdom from fashion's Papa Bear.
6. Worst-Kept Secret: Although news of Chima's departure broke days before, Big Brother finally shows America just what went down before producers evicted the tantrum-prone contestant for breaking the house rules and destroying her microphone in the Jacuzzi. Surprisingly, she created much less drama on the way out than she did during her tenure. First came the banana, then the sour grapes.
5. Best Guest: During the Season 7 premiere of Top Chef, renowned chef and restaurateur Wolfgang Puck chucks one cheftestant's donut across the room, describing it as "like a golfball." (He also tells Tom Colicchio he would have thrown one of the contestants in the deep fryer along with his steak if he were one of Puck's cooks.) After several seasons of droll and/or pretentious judges, Puck is delicious.
4. Fastest Lightning Strike: Four days after shattering his 100-meter world record to a ridiculous 9.58 seconds, Usain "Lightning" Bolt flat-out destroyed his 200-meter world record as well at the Track and Field World Championships, clocking in at the unreal time of 19.19 seconds. He shaved .11 seconds off each record - an eternity in the sprint world - to become the first man to hold the 100m and 200m world and Olympic titles and world records simultaneously. For all you cynics out there, he's tested clean, so just ask yourself: How low can he go?
3. Best Surprises: Amid the obvious choices (Melissa Joan Hart, Donny Osmond), Dancing with the Stars throws in a wild card as Tom Bergeron announces the next round of contestants. Can former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay dance? It may not matter, because the show's about rounding up votes. And that's exactly what majority leaders do.
2. Hottest Potential President: If Tom DeLay can be a dancer, why can't Britney Spears be commander-in-chief? The ex-pop tart continues her stunning image rehabilitation tour by stopping in at the Late Show with David Letterman to read the top ten ways the world would be different if she were president. She does it the way she does everything lately - in a bikini. Among the items on her list: "Free pie for everybody," and "Finally the media would pay some attention to me."
1. Best Mix of Business and Pleasure: Mad Men's achingly closeted Salvatore Romano finally gets his first same-sex action - with a hotel bellhop - but gets caught by Don Draper. Their shared look as Sal is discovered sets up a stunning exchange. Don, who knows a bit about keeping secrets, gives Sal some advice he couches as an ad campaign slogan: "Limit your exposure." Given that everything on Mad Men is about selling, Don ends up using the slogan in the campaign and in life.