Paula Abdul's 'Idol' finale speech to Simon Cowell: Pure poetry.

Hey, Paula. Paula, Paula, Paula. Last night, during your goodbye speech to Simon Cowell, you showed the world why season 9 of American Idol has been so lacking. Why the series this season hasn't boasted the same spark and awe of years past. Simply, it's because your mere absence has sucked the joy out of the entire show.

And if you think I'm joking, you'd be wrong. I have been yearning for Paula's infectious presence all season long - Idol is not Idol without a good dose of battiness. So what better way to celebrate her appearance on the show last night than to revive The Poetry of Paula Abdul one last time? After the jump, read Paula's final Idol-centric poetic masterpiece, which she performed on last night's finale. Really, it's like reading Walt Whitman reincarnated!

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