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Recap: "The Last Waltz"


"Karen, I've got a car. There's more."


How great was that opening dream sequence? The whole wedding congregation turned to look at Hank during the "Forever hold your peace" line and he looked back like, "What?! Please, as you were." But then, of course, he does the grand romantic gesture anyway, as only a Hank can. Tonight was so funny, so incredibly romantic.


A lot happened - and I think everyone grew up a little this episode. Becca got her first period, and her dad "handled the f--k out of that s--t" by getting in a supermarket fight for tampons (hilarious, and oh so Moody). She then played, appropriately enough, "Only Women Bleed" at the reception - a startling choice for its very adult lyrics, its very unromantic vision of marriage, and the fact that Bill actually let Becca's band play in the first place. Meanwhile, Mia grew a heart and lied to everyone about her sexual relations with Hank in order to protect Becca. But Hank grew up the most by stepping back and letting Karen make her own decisions, without trying to influence her either way. It was an act of real love to let her go like that, but we already knew how much Hank loves Karen, didn't we. Speaking of which, I was feeling pretty overwhelmed and grief-stricken when Hank apologized to Karen for never giving her "a day like today. I look around and it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." What a gorgeous moment.


Bill, meanwhile, although never a particularly warm person to begin with, had some scenes tonight of real jerkhood. After reading his 16-year-old daughter's graphic tales of violent sex with a much-older man, his biggest concern is his own business reputation? Then when he decides to let it get published after all, it's only because he "feels better knowing that it didn't really happen"? That's pretty horrible parenting behavior. In those scenes Bill was making dirty old Hank look like father of the year, I'd say. So if Bill lets Mia publish the book, Hank obviously can't get it back, therefore as long as Mia continues lying about her relations with Hank, she'll get away with stealing the manuscript. That basically means that Hank has traded his book for protection for his family from some very painful information. What a sad situation to find himself in.


But let's get to the funny, because there's a lot of funny to cover. First off, the tampon fight was great. The fact that it ended in buddyhood between Hank and grocery-store guy just added to my enjoyment of the whole scene. ("How's the hair?") Another funny: When Hank and Becca pulled up to the wedding, music blasting, and Hank gestured to his filthy, absurdist car and told the valet not to scratch it. So good. I also loved Hank and Charlie's bro pinkie wiggle when Mia told everyone that Karen was still in love with Hank. But best of all in the funny department was the much-loved Marcy. She nearly stole the show once again. Stoned and freaked-out, Marcy offered her unique views on anal obligations in the marital bed, plus a glorious analysis of the recent sexual event that changed her perspective, f'ed her up, stole her innocence. Her entire conversation with Karen was so funny, so earnest. Karen and Marcy are a such a terrific pair, aren't they? And when Marcy got so high that she thought Mia's whole confession speech was in her imagination? She might well have made herself my favorite Californicator tonight. Although, you know, I really don't like to pick favorites.


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