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'Bones' recap: Permanent Detention

High school is pretty awful in real life, but it's even worse on TV. All the students look about 27 (which is either poor casting or a stealth commentary on the failure of No Child Left Behind). Everyone gets bullied and/or pregnant. Everyone sleeps with a teacher or frames a teacher for sleeping with them. Important life lessons are learned every week, which just seems exhausting. Also, no one ever goes to college, and if they do, everything goes downhill. On last night's Bones, Booth and Brennan went back to school to solve the Case of the Melting Skeleton. In the process, they experienced enough high school storylines to fill a complete season of The OC (or ten minutes of Glee.)

The episode began with a truck spontaneously combusting. The arson investigator couldn’t initially find a cause for the fire, and blamed it on an asteroid. Brennan figured out he was joking. She started joking, too. "This white powder could be the remnants of a highly localized blizzard!" she deadpanned. (Global warming isn't a joke, Brennan!) Then they discovered a melty skeleton in the truck. Of course, as we all know, bones don't melt. Even more confusing: there was a bullet lodged in the chest cavity.

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