'Real Housewives of New Jersey' recap: A tale of two turkeys

This week's RHONJ pays homage to that most storied tradition: the fake holiday. So here we have two feuding gangs of shellacked women and their ilk, celebrating what is decidedly not Thanksgiving, all to build a little dramatic tension. There was a lot of jumping back and forth this episode, so let's just compare the dueling camps' celebrations. The Very Sexual Gorgas' Not Thanksgiving One Not Thanksgiving will be hosted by the Very Sexual Gorga's Marble Palace. Melissa and her husband, Joey Donut Holes head to the local Italian supermart for turkey, ham, pineapple, bufala mozzarella, then not pineapple and certainly not wheat bread, and all the fixins. Melissa picks up a pork shoulder -- or butt, as it is commonly called -- and the Very Sexual Joey Donut Holes can't help himself. He wants to know what side of the butt this is, slaps it enthusiastically, and then proudly proclaims to the poor meat clerk: "I'm an ass man!" Melissa explains that as per her family tradition, the women cook enough food to feed the local populace, and the men lay around grunting like slobs until they are fed and can resume grunting from a reclined position.  Read More...



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