Poor Jason Stackhouse. First Crystal dumped him, going off to have kittens with her cousin and leaving Jason with the responsibility for a whole junkyard full of stray werepanthers. Then, last episode, his good-Samaritan caretaking was repaid with betrayal: walloped on the head and imprisoned in an icebox. And now? He comes to, tied to a bed, being copiously licked by one of his teenage were-wards.
"You've got a real nasty gash here," Timbo explains. Euuuuugh. Werepanther medical practice leaves a lot to be desired.
Jason almost convinces Timbo to set him free, only to be burst in upon by... whoa! It's Phil! Crystal is nowhere in sight, and there's a typical manly exchange of bravado—"F--- you!" "F--- me?!" "YEAH!"—until a shotgun next to Jason's face puts an end to the conversation. COULD THIS BE THE END OF JASON STACKHOUSE?!
Well, we'll get back to that.
Meanwhile, disappointment: Last episode's fangs-out cliffhanger has dissolved into bickering, with not a single bite in sight. Sookie wants Eric to leave, he points out that he owns the house, she protests that the house doesn't come with her in it.
"Well, then I seriously overpaid," Eric deadpans. He reminds Sookie that when other vampires catch a whiff of her delicious aroma and word gets out about her sunlight-deflecting faerie blood, she will not be safe—and that he can offer her protection if she'll just be his. (Okay, protection from bodily harm and unlimited access to that body? This deal is looking pretty good to us.) Sookie refuses, but she also finds herself sassing him back in a kinda-sorta sexy way! Eric claims it's her faerie side peeking out—because Faerie Sookie isn't blind, apparently—and leaves with the suggestion that she let her supernatural self take the reins. For her own safety, of course, and not because Faerie Sook digs his Viking charm. Read More...