At the John Varvatos Fashion's Night Out party yesterday, Thomas Jane came correct in a pair of Varvatos pants. "I am a real fan," he told us. "I have him in my closet. That sounded funny. I don't have John Varvatos in my closet. I have clothes that he ... you know what I'm trying to say." If he did have the real Varvatos in his closet, that would be a good plotline for Jane's HBO series, Hung, right? Not quite, replied the actor. "I told HBO, the year I end up with a penis in my mouth is the last year of the show," Jane said. "That's the last episode. If they want to keep me around, there's certain guidelines they have to follow. Not all of us can be bloodsucking vampires. That's not all they're sucking, you know! Sorry!" He continued to discuss matters of manhood while telling us about a Western he wrote and plans to direct, entitled The Magnificent Death From a Shattered Hand. "Marlon Brando said acting's not a profession for real men," laughed Jane. "It's not a real man's job. And I agree with him, so I'm going to direct."