The X Factor Recap: Five Million Dollars’ Worth of Integrity

It’s the FINALS! Steve Jones promises surprises, and I believe him, because I’m 98 percent sure they've made this entire season up as they went along.

Our obligatory intro package tells us what we already know about our three finalists, almost in haiku form. Josh: humble, burritos. Melanie: went home, accent, teased. Chris: meth. May I speak for you when I say we are completely clear on all of this? Thank you.

And tonight we’ll be coming live from the finalists’ hometowns, where their fans have gathered to watch en masse: Josh’s pep rally is in his old high school, Chris’s is at the nightclub where he used to perform, and Melanie’s is at her South Florida megachurch. Tell me that doesn’t sum them up perfectly. Simon promises that this will be "the closest final in X Factor history," which is difficult to dispute because this is the first season. Read More...


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