Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Field Day

In honor of poor, conflicted, blossoming, screechy Gia Giudice, today's recap of The Throwing Down in Franklin Lakes Programme is brought to you by the notable chapters in a book called What's Happening to My Body? Book for Girls: A Growing Up Guide for Parents and Daughters.

1. Puberty
The reason Teresa is batshit and irrational to everyone is because her husband is borderline abusive. Joe Giudice wants her to cut her entire family out of their lives after the fallout with Joe Gorga, except, generously, he will allow the kids to continue playing togeth — oh, never mind, he doesn't even want the Gorga kids around either. Teresa tells him to take it back. "When I say something, you fucking listen, and shut up." He essentially goes on to be like.

"My husband is so a Gemini," Teresa giggles Stockholm Syndromely in a talking head interview, but not before pure hamsterlike terror flickers in her eyes for a second. It is the first of many times tonight that you will wish that New Jersey's Division of Youth and Family Services had a jingle easy enough for these people to remember. Since they're, y'know, illiterate. Read More...


Want to comment on this? First, you must log in to your SideReel account!