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Stephen Colbert: Pope Francis Is Batman — Check Out the Nipples on His Suit (Video)

Stephen Colbert, our nation’s self-proclaimed “most famous Catholic,” knew there was something funny about the newish holy leader — but what he didn’t realize until now is that Pope Francis is Batman. Rumors have emerged that Pope Francis sneaks out of the Vatican at night in regular priest clothes and ministers to the homeless. Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/colbert-report-pope-francis-batman-stephen-colbert

Stephen Colbert Petition Calls on Obama to Execute Thanksgiving Turkey (Video)

This could be it, folks: The petition that makes the White House give up on the whole idea of welcoming online petitions. On Monday’s “Colbert Report,” Stephen Colbert launched a petition calling on the president to execute Caramel, a turkey who lost an online contest to receive this year’s presidential pardon. After a turkey named Popcorn won the president’s mercy, the White House decided to spare Caramel as well — which is thoroughly un-American, Colbert said. Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-petition-calls-obama-execute-thanksgiving-turkey-video/

Stephen Colbert Worries Without Filibusters, Something Will Get Done in Washington (Video)

Stephen Colbert is packing up and getting the hell out of this country as quickly as possible on what he called “the last day of America” Thursday. Why would the nation’s No. 1 fan ditch his homeland for a little-known foreign territory called “South Carolina?” Well, Senate Democrats employed the so-called “nuclear option,” effectively killing filibuster power, which has been abused by Republicans in recent years.   Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-report-filibuster-nuclear-option-congress-senate-comedy-central

Stephen Colbert Is Ready for Snow — Rep. Trey Radel’s Coke (Video)

The holidays are upon us, and Stephen Colbert is ready for the winter wonderland to return. ”Speaking of snow: cocaine,” the comedian said on Wednesday night’s “Colbert Report.” Colbert was disappointed to learn that Florida Congressman and Tea Party stalwart Trey Radel pleaded guilty to buying the drug from an undercover cop. Apparently Radel missed the historical Tea Party memo about dumping your product in the harbor before the feds arrive, Colbert joked.   Read More.... http://www.thewrap.com/colbert-report-trey-radel-cocaine-stephen-colbert-tea-party-comedy-central

Stephen Colbert Praises Slate’s New Read Time Feature: Web Stories Are Huge Commitments (Video)

Stephen Colbert doesn’t like to waste precious time ,  so the “Colbert Report” host praised Slate.com for a new feature which allows readers to see an estimation of how long each story will take to read before having to undergo the arduous process of actually clicking on a link. “Thank you. Because clicking on a story is a huge commitment,” Colbert said on Tuesday’s episode. “First you have to aim the cursor, then it takes about two seconds to load, then I gotta scan the thing to see how long it is. If I want to back out, I have to reload the page where I came from. Now as many as eight seconds have passed, and I’m that much closer to the cold embrace of death.”  Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-praises-slates-new-read-time-feature-clicking-story-huge-commitment-video/

Stephen Colbert: Obamacare Makes Michele Bachmann Look Like a Genius (Video)

Stephen Colbert took a victory lap on Monday’s edition of “The Colbert Report,” gloating that the technical problems that are hampering the rollout of Obamacare are validating Republican opposition to the legislation. “Things are going pretty well for conservatives and we’ve handled this sudden good fortune with our trademark grace and humility,” Colbert said, cutting to a string of far right commentators saying, “I told you so.” “Obamacare’s failure means liberalism is dead,” Colbert added.  Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-obamacare-makes-michele-bachmann-look-like-genius-video/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=stephen-colbert-obamacare-makes-michele-bachmann-look-like-genius-video

Stephen Colbert Mocks 'Today's' On-Air Prostate Exams (Video)

Among those inspired by Matt Lauer and Al Roker 's on-air prostate exams during last week's Today show was Stephen Colbert 's late-night host character, who saw an opportunity to out-do Today with a star-studded, over-the-top on-air exam. "I will not be out-sweep-swept by the Today show," Colbert said of their segment. "It's no accident that they pulled this ground-breaking stunt during November sweeps because the Today show knows what brings in the great ratings: Men in their 50s, being finger-puppeted," he added.  Read More...   http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/thr/television/~3/LasgQyzirUY/story01.htm

Stephen Colbert on Drone Strikes: Bad for Your Sex Life, Good for the Economy (Video)

Stephen Colbert loves his homeland and will defend its use of force to the bitter end. “The United States is the world’s policeman — that’s why we eat so many donuts,” the Comedy Central host quipped. Still, you can’t police six billion people with breaking a few eggs. That’s the saying, right? The U.S. is under attack from international human rights groups who accuse the country of killing dozens of civilians in Pakistan and Yemen with drone strikes, which could amount to war crimes.   Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-drones-colbert-report?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=stephen-colbert-drone-strikes-bad-sex-life-good-economy-video

Stephen Colbert: ‘Obamacare Is 58 Times Harder to Get Into Than Harvard’ (Video)

Stephen Colbert had a major announcement to make on Tuesday’s “Report.” “I don’t like Barack Obama,” said the conservative character bluntly stated, opening his late night show. Why? “The man’s a liar,” he explained. At least in the way he sold Obamacare to Colbert Nation, insisting that those currently covered will be able to maintain their benefits package. But, “Millions of Americans have had their coverage ripped from them — I believe it’s the plot of ‘Taken 3?,” Colbert quipped.   Read More... http://www.thewrap.com/stephen-colbert-obamacare-58-times-harder-get-harvard-video/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=stephen-colbert-obamacare-58-times-harder-get-harvard-video

Stephen Colbert vs. Louis C.K.: Who Gettysburg Addresses Better?

  Seven score and ten years ago (give or take a week), on Thursday, November 19, 1863, President Abraham Lincoln delivered the Gettysburg Address. To honor the 150th anniversary, bowl-cut documentarian Ken Burns has launched a website with the mission to encourage people to memorize the speech. Sure, the site features fancy people like presidents, cardinals, and rabbis (just like the classic joke, "a president, cardinal, and rabbi walk into a bar; they each recite the Gettysburg Address"), but more important, it features celebs like Uma Thurman, Jimmy Kimmel, Steven Spielberg, and Conan O'Brien. Below, watch Stephen Colbert, Louis C.K., Usher, and Alyssa Milano give the address, and vote for who did it best in the comments. Winner is the next president, probably.   http://www.vulture.com/2013/11/colbert-ck-who-gettysburg-addresses-better.html
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