On the premiere of sixth season of Top Chef last night, it was clear that this season will have an uncontested resident douche bag. 34-year-old Mike Isabella from New Jersey said, "a girl shouldn't be at the same level I am" when he noticed that Jennifer C. was matching him clam for clam on the opener's quickfire challenge. See, the 17 chef-testants were divided into four teams to compete in a mise en place relay, where hey had to cut and clean different meats (clams, shrimp, lobster, beef). You know what sucks most about douche bags? When they're actually pretty good.
On Top Chef's opening challenge, this happened, but not before a group of showgirls went to the kitchen high-kicking. Perhaps the official way Vegas welcomes people? The chefs were very much amused though.
Going back, the Top Chef 17 chefs drew chips from a hat to do their groupings. After which, the race began, and the teams started to open clams, peel prawns, shell lobsters, and cut rib-eye steaks. Jennifer Z., 33 from Philadelphia, actually cut herself while doing battle with the stubborn clams, and with actual blood, too. Meanwhile, as what normally happens to people who dish out sexist remarks in the 21st century, Jennifer C's team won. And Jennifer C, thanks to her clam ceviche, won a sweet $15,000 chip.
Going forward, the elimination challenge was actually very interesting. The chefs needed to create a dish based on a vice. During the mad dash for ingredients, Mike went at it again. Having a hard time pronouncing or remembering a contestant's name, he just went "Purty or Pretty or whatever she is." Later on, he'd refer to Eli, 25 of Atlanta, Georgia, as a "little monkey." Seriously?
When judging time came, some of the chefs came up with pretty interesting and clever interpretations for their vices, which included hot temper (Mike, obviously), smoking, drinking, and procrastination - wait, that's a vice? In the end, Kevin, with his procrastination-inspired slow-cooked arctic char with turnip salsa verde, wins, while Jennifer Z. was booted out for using seitan.