'MasterChef' recap: Two Chefs Enter, One Chef Leaves

Previously on "The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, & The Crybaby" ("MasterChef")... well, if you need a recap at this point, you haven't really been paying attention. David and Whitney are your two finalists. Other than some Gordon Ramsay hyperbole -- "The next two hours are the most important of your lives!" -- what else do you need to know?

We shall miss you most of all, credits that spent more time on the glowering judges than on the contestants whose hopes and dreams we were supposed to give a s*** about.

Gordon welcomes us to the "MasterChef" main event. We've gone from tens of thousands of amateur cooks from across this great country of ours to a parade of sadsacks and losers we further whittled down, until we were left with just two people -- Whitney, the 22-year-old student and David, the one-time software engineer and full-time chucklehead. Someone's getting an oversized novelty check by the end of tonight. Oh, and there are cookbooks involved, too. To the "MasterChef" battlestations!

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