Two and a Half Men Season 7, Episode 3: "Mmm, Fish. Yum." - Recap


On this week's Two and a Half Men, Charlie and Alan try to hide some questionable behavior. And Jake tries to profit from one of them.


Judith and Herb decide to take a vacation out to Laguna Beach. Jake comes to stay with Alan, but Judith has her mother watch Milli. Of course, the idea doesn't sit too well with Alan, who doesn't want a Betty Ford drop-out watching "his" baby. Judith makes a half-hearted denial about the paternity subject, which makes one wonder if she even cares that Alan could really be the father.


Meanwhile, Charlie is having issues with Sir Lancelot and Jake. Neither one of them will leave him alone. He keeps tripping over the cat, and Jake relentlessly tries to get Charlie to let him drive his car. All Charlie wants to do is take a nap, but that turns out to be impossible with a permit-wielding Jake in the house.


Over at Judith's house, her mom, Lenore, can't seem to figure out the house alarm and calls Alan for help. He jumps at the chance to spend time with Milli, even if it means being around his drunken former mother-in-law, Lenore. Lenore turns out to be the lovely Annie Potts, who is still just as endearing as she was when she appeared with Cryer in 1986's Pretty in Pink. However, instead thinking of Duckie, er, Alan, as a pal, she tries to seduce him. Luckily for everyone involved, Alan would rather suffer a stroke than let Lenore lick him - yes, she licks him. Judith calls and asks Alan to go to the house to check up on her mother, not realizing that he's already there. Alan does his best to cover his ass, while Lenore does her best to show off hers.


Back in Malibu, Charlie finally agrees to go out to eat with Jake, but still refuses to let the boy drive his $80,000 Mercedes. While backing out of the garage (and hearing a thud and pained meow), Jake finally finds something that would make Charlie change his mind - Sir Squished-a-Lot. Now, I would never want to see a cat harmed, but I was actually excited to think this could be the end of Sir Lancelot. I was getting a little tired of hearing about Chelsea's cat and thought the accident might even drive a wedge between her and Charlie that would lead to a breakup. No such luck. Jake gets some good blackmail shots of Charlie standing over the "catcake" before they both secretly bury the poor thing.


While Charlie is stuck digging a hole, Alan is busy trying to avoid digging his own grave. He eventually gets a loaded Lenore and sleeping Milli into the car for the ride back to Malibu. When Lenore overhears Alan on the phone telling Judith that he's driving the inebriated grandmother to the "hab-rey" (rehab, for those who are rusty with their Pig Latin), she bolts out of the car and on to the highway. She dances right in front of Charlie and Jake, who seems barely fazed by the condition of his grandmother. Poor kid, he just has no luck in the grandmother department. One is a horny, pill-popping cougar, and the other is Evelyn.


Later on, Jake is testing out his newfound bribery skills when Chelsea shows up carrying a perfectly unharmed Sir Lancelot. It turns out he was just hiding after all. "Leverage is a fickle bitch, my friend," Charlie tells a disappointed Jake. It would appear Jake loses the upper hand, but then the doorbell rings. A man so burly that he barely fits in the doorframe is looking for his cat, which answers to the name Puss-Puss and bares a striking resemblance to Sir Lancelot. A satisfied Jake tells his uncle that it "looks like the fickle bitch is back."


Though the season seems to be missing something (like chemistry between Charlie and Chelsea, and more storylines for Jake), the guest appearance of Potts was unexpected and hilarious. Hopefully, she decides to quit running and return for some more appearances. If we can't have Rose back, Lenore might be a suitable temporary replacement. But seriously already, bring Rose back!


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