THE X FACTOR “Live Show 3? Review

X Factor (itv) "Live Show 3"

Paije is up first. He sings Ain’t Nobody. He is seriously disappointing me with his chain from the 90s and pink jacket. I thought he’d at least take a risk fashionwise. Oh, the singing. He can sing. Which is good. He can sing very well. (Zzzzzzzz) He’ll probably go home.

Rebecca is up next, looking rather stunning-well, except for the giant pink growth on her hip. She’s not as good as last week, and even Simon and Cheryl are chit chatting during her performance. She makes a half arsed attempt to flirt with the pianist.

John Adeleye has a lovely voice. He sings Zoom. He used to be nice to look at too, and then he did something with his hair. What is that? I’m waiting for baby birds to stick their naked heads out of that hedge and peck his head until it looks like wet cake. Wow. He’s like kryptonite to television. And I swear I forced myself to watch the screen, but somehow during his performance I managed to take notes and color coordinate my M&Ms. Even the camera man was more entertained by the dancers in the background.

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