'Sons of Anarchy' recap: SAMCRO: 1, STAHL: 0

sons-of-anarchy-finale-320.jpgSo! The season finale! Which could have actually been an hour-long episode if only there weren't so many gratuitous musical montages. Anyway, here's what happened that mattered:Remember how Jax made a deal with Stahl to deliver Jimmy O alive? And remember how SAMCRO made a deal with the Real IRA to deliver Jimmy O dead in order to get access to a better gun market? These two goals are not compatible! The club decides to buy Jimmy off the Eastern European mobsters who are allegedly arranging his safe passage, all for the low, low price of $2 million. Fortunately for the perpetually-broke bikers, they don't have to come up with $2 million in real currency -- Chuckie's got $5 million in pretend money he's been sitting on.

So the Russians deliver Jimmy O to SAMCRO in some godforsaken middle-of-nowhere place. SAMCRO hands over a few duffel bags of fake money (with some real ATF funds mixed in, in what is probably the most effective use of taxpayer funds in FY 2010). Because SAMCRO has somehow acquired the kind of logistics mastery that only Lex Luthor can dream of, in addition to getting Jimmy O spirited away, they also manage to lead the pissed-off Russians right into the ATF snare, so SAMCRO gets away with passing along funny money ... for now.

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