The second season begins with Sully in voice-over, talking about how he's not afraid of much. As he speaks, it's a nighttime scene of thugs in ski masks taking a plastic tarp and some shovels out of a trunk. We hear tinkly music as they gather up a plastic-wrapped, still-moving body and put it in the trunk, placing the tarp and shovels back in with it. Our point of view is at times from inside the trunk, Tarantino-style. Everything's in slow motion. Sully talks about how he's not afraid of heights, as evidenced by that one time he helped a jumper by going out on the George Washington Bridge. The thugs drive off in the car, and as Sully keeps on relatin', they arrive at their destination near the bridge. They take the body out as Sully says that everybody has something that makes their skin crawl. Like this show, for instance, or the thought of Dave Thomas showering. The thugs carry the body to a pre-dug square grave. They put the body in, then throw some jugs of water down there. Is this some sort of Fox Secrets of Magic Revealed special? The buried man takes off the cowl on his head, and it's an old man, not Sully. The bad guys throw some wood over him, sealing the man in his grave. Then they start piling in the dirt as Sully reveals that his worst fear is being buried alive. The no-good crooks put a pipe in the piece of wood, allowing the guy down there a way to breathe. We cut to Sully crawling through what looks like a sewer, waving a flashlight in front of him. Ty calls out to him and we see him, up above, through a street grate. He asks if Sully wants him to call the station and ask for a back-up set of keys. "No!" Sully shouts, clearly distressed. Claustrophobic, much? Ty tries to reason with Sully, but Sully yells at him that if he isn't going to help, to just shut up. Then, miraculously, Sully finds his keys in a pool of icky brown stuff. Since this show is heavy on symbolism, I'm guessing the brown goo is a literary reference or symbolic of poo.
We move on to Kim. Oh, Kim. What would Third Watch be without sweet, conflicted, sex-with-the-ex Kim? She is walking into Jimmy's hospital room, which is equipped with a moody bedside lamp. In a hospital. A set designer stops the scene, walks in, and says, "Oops, sorry, that lamp belongs on the Lifetime network," and takes it away with him. As he wakes, looking like Ben Affleck, Jimmy says, "Brooke?" "No," Kim says, and she even looks happy saying it, as if she's thinking, "While Brooke's away, the ex will play." He asks, in a friendly way, what she's doing there. Instead of saying, "I know you've been shot and all, but I was just hoping to have a nookie session during my break," she is dishonest and makes it sound like he's on her way to wherever it is she's going while on duty. They make some small talk. Jimmy boasts that the doctors are amazed at his recovery. Why, he could be up on his feet in as little as a week. In fact, they estimate, he'll probably be back on duty by 10 p.m. Eastern time next Monday! Kim gets paged. Jimmy engages in some Florence Nightingale Syndrome by complimenting Kim on her hair, which is in a ponytail and getting long. It's like it grew a whole summer's worth in just a few days! Kim's got SuperHair. She says she has to go respond to her pager's call, but that she'll see him on Friday. She gets up to leave and kisses his forehead. Then she leans in for the real kiss, but they both don't commit and it ends up being a lean-in, with no lippage. She gets awkward and says she has to go while Jimmy wonders why he didn't think of this before: the ladies now just come to him and he doesn't even have go anywhere or spend any money. Genius, I tell you. Kim leaves as Jimmy leans back with a little bemused macho look on his face that betrays a touch of yearning. Back in the sewer where Sully sullied himself (ha ha, I love that joke), Ty watches as the key-losing cop pulls himself out of the manhole. Ty is smiling, and Sully warns him not to say a word. It's almost a Laurel and Hardy routine, but without the dialogue, the timing, or the sense of humor. And of course, without Laurel and Hardy. Ty makes a noise indicating how smelly Sullied Sully is, and they replace the manhole. Ty jokes that they need to get Sully a big keychain with an air filter on it like they have at gas stations. When did Ty become the deliverer of punchlines on this show? Sully threatens Ty, because he knows if this story gets out it will have come from his partner. Then, just as he's wiping off with a little handkerchief, a big car drives along and splashes puddle water all over Sully. Wonk, wonk, wonk...next he'll be slipping on a hot banana. Sully curses. Loudly.
Inside the splashy car, the two burying crooks look back and see the police cruiser turning around to follow. "Slow down," the passenger says. The driver starts freaking. "Are they following?" he asks. "Yeah, they're following!" the buddy replies. You know, playwright Harold Pinter tried to write dialogue like this, but he could never quite master the form. Sully is mad. Ty asks what Sully will cite them for, assaulting an officer with a puddle? Oh, Ty, you're like Shecky Greene this week! Police car chases bad guys. Bad guys argue about pulling over. Ty puts on seat belt and calls for back-up. The bad guys' arguing escalates. A gun is drawn. And then, the inevitable: they slam into a car. Another car slams into a different car. Mass chaos. Glass flies. Bodies are flung out of car windshields. Ty and Sully stop in front of the carnage, guns drawn, to inspect the damage. The bad-guy driver looks bloody and dead. His passenger is lying comfortably on another car's windshield, also looking pretty dead. A bloody man yells out for help for his wife.