'Jersey Shore' recap: Sammi vs. the World

Kids! I don't know what's wrong with these kids today. They're all about sex, hair product, nightclubs that only play techno, drugs that have intensely scientific names, and fashion that makes everyone look like a French hooker from some awful Broadway musical about why France is awesome.  (This is all information I have gleaned from the nonstop advertisements for MTV's Skins.) Friends, how have we so completely failed to instill in this oncoming generation an appreciation for the simple pleasures in life? The sound of a baby's laughter. The smell of roses freshly in bloom. The taste of a tall Sazerac on a hot Kentucky evening. The inhuman sound of Arnold Schwarzenegger screaming. Or the simplest pleasure of all: the immortal sight of two attractive women in their pajamas fighting each other like a pair of Victorian-era street orphans who are thisclose to turning cannibal. Read more...



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