Dancing with the Stars Episode Recap: Tuesday, May 24, 2011

It's finale night! Will it be Chelsea and Mark? Hines and Kym? Kirstie and Maksim? How can you even stand the wait? How are you still reading this?!?

"A journey by definition is the active traveling of one place to another," says Bergeron gravely at the top of the episode. So begins the first in what will be several montages tonight. Via the flashbacks to earlier in the season, we're to believe that people overcame obstacles and wardrobe malfunctions and being dropped to get to theDancing with the Stars Top 3. And then, at the end of the montage some words pop up on screen: "Journey: becoming a champion." But I thought he just said that journey was the active traveling of one place to another. Let's not redefine the definition of journey, Bergeron. Before you know it, we'll be witnessing protests from people across the country with only their defiance to keep them occupied.

The opening group dance leaves streamers all over the ground after coming to a party-favor explosive finish. They're just begging for a last-minute spill. Go out with a bang, as they say! Or so it would seem ... a very long montage of last night's performances, including Hines in that ridiculous marching band/gladiator outfit, gives them plenty of time to clean up. Sadly! Read More...



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