'The Real Housewives of New York City' recap: Seeing Red

These women, such marvelous friends to one another. The first half of the episode was devoted to Ramona's desire to include Sonja in her birthday party. She just loves Sonja is all, the woman is her sunshine, her sister. Ramona decided that Sonja could have five of her own friends at the party, and two photos in the slide show. She was going all out for the celebration: Evites, napkins (happy now, Jill?), scallops. This party was going to blow Avery's out of the water. Eat it, sweet 16.

Cindy threw herself a little party too, in what appeared to be a roller skating rink or the rich kid's basement in which I first got drunk in high school. It was a vajewelling kind of a night which meant unfortunate shots of a lot of confused-looking men (and a gleeful Brad) lifting up their work shirts so they could get a tacky heart or butterfly glued on to their pale bellies. Jill sniffed and declared that real men don't vajewel themselves. Cindy may have offered to wax Simon's chest which made Alex snort her wheezy tire laugh that always makes me feel depressed. Read More...

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