'Jersey Shore' Recap: 'I'm An Individual!' Yelled the Nameless Skank (and Other Bedtime Stories)

Sit down, children, for I shall tell you a tale. A bedtime tale; a tale of beds moved and moved upon (sexually). A tale of the time that Ronnie punched Mike into oblivion for something he may or may not have said about sex that Ron may or may not have had. Or wanted to have. But I'm getting ahead. That's the ending. Let us start at the beginning.

We open on Mike in bed with one of the twins, and Vinny in bed with the other -- after she first came home with Mike, then hooked up with Deena. "I'm an individual!" the sluttier one yells at Mike when he tries to get the F out alongside her twin sister. Yes, dear, you are a unique, special snowflake -- as evidenced by the fact that this show refuses to acknowledge that you have a name. Unfortunately, my psychic powers (the internet) tell me we'll be seeing Thing 1 and Sluttier Thing 2 later this season. Read More...



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