'Jersey Shore' Recap: Mike Fought the Wall and the Wall Won

Last night, a special episode of Jersey Shore aired before the VMAs as a special reminder to everyone that despite the pomp and circumstance and moon men, MTV is not about music videos anymore; it's about watching shameless goons pummel and do each other. Does the 'M' technically stand for 'masochism' yet?

OK, maybe I'm a little bitter. But, like Ronnie to Sammi, you've been playing me like a fool, MTV. You know what I'm talking about. The fight that you've been promoting for weeks (think about how sick that is for a second) between Ronnie and The Situation? I trusted you. I expected a brawl; a battle; a blitzkrieg of juiced up pecs and guns. And this whole time, it turns out you were lying by omission. It was never Ronnie's fist that sent Mike to the hospital that dark and drunken night in Florence. In a moment of unbridled rage, distilled through his constant stupidity, Mike smashed his own head into his own bedroom wall, and that's how he ended up in the hospital. I would laugh (and laugh and laugh and laaaaugh) if I didn't feel so betrayed. Read More...



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