'The X Factor' recap: Hi. We're in...Newark.

For the fourth and final auditions episode of The X Factor, cool Steve Jones and the Gang visited Newark (just across the river from the real city, they swear) and San Francisco. Most of the two hours was a whole lotta nothing, but there was a lovely montage at the end set to Starship's "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" that got me thinking about the movie Mannequin for awhile and really brightened up my evening. So maybe it was all worth it?

Also, at one point, the talent was so terrible that Simon was feeding Paula some sort of tiny food particles one by one. I really wanted them to be capers. At many points, the shadow of Simon's microphone created the illusion of a BIG patch of extra chest hair in his deep V. Oh, and Stevecrest had some hot stubble in Newark. And there you have it — my favorite moments of the night! Read More...



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