The X Factor Recap: Wait! It’s Actually Starting to Get Fun!

Paula and Pharell dissect the groups on The X Factor.

Ladies and gentlemen, it is on like B.D. Wong. Tonight, I started truly enjoying The X Factor. I’m as surprised as you are.

Okay, it’s still way too long. Four hours a week is, at this stage, far too long a time commitment. The producers still want viewers to believe that everyone over 30 is some kind of elegant tragic creature. And there are still way too many people, but that’s about to get fixed, as 32 must become 16! Which they’ll almost certainly stretch out into another night. This show is in no particular hurry to do anything.

But it’s starting to get fun!

Not right away. Tonight’s show starts with shy teenager Jazzlyn Little, who is nervous in the awful way. We are shown a long shot of her shakily trying to raise a bottle of water to her lips, and it’s like if Allen Carr had produced The Blair Witch Project. Jazzlyn sings well enough, but you do suspect that Simon will put her through to the next round just to see what happens. Deep, cleansing breaths, Jazzlyn!

On to Brennin Hunt, whose major concerns are that he is 26 and too handsome. Brennin tells us that if he doesn’t make it to the next round, "it will eat [me] alive," which is something you should only say if you’re absolutely certain you’re not someone people would like to watch get eaten alive. Oh, and he wears one of those deep V-neck T-shirts. He is a medley of things I hate. You know how performers on It’s Showtime at the Apollo rub the trunk of the Tree of Hope for good luck before they go out onstage? I want to punch Brennin Hunt in the face before I do everything. As for his performance, Rihanna sums it up perfectly: "He is beautiful, and his tone is correct at times." Read More...


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