America's Next Top Model: All-Stars 17.12 "Tyson Beckford" Review

Cycle 17 of Top Model has thus far been on the wrong side of the crazy train, backing away from the show's so-bad-its-perfect typical formula and going for a we're-vaguely-trying-and-failing-miserably bland of dull desperation that simply won't do. Top Model is nothing with out a little looniness and in continuing the charade that dressing like Snooki and eating a hot dog freely will gain you fame and fortune, cycle 17 has lacked the fun that earlier cycles exuded in spades.

But tonight, y'all...tonight was something else, to say the least. In my years of watching Top Model, I've never been as dumbfounded as I was watching whatever that motion editorial was. Awkward laughter, wide eyes, a few "what the hell"s - every time Allison dressed like a cat or Lisa held a baby doll or Laura ate whipped cream too sexily, I was flabbergasted to the point of exhilaration. If Tyra has the stones to knowingly put something like this on TV, she's either hideously not self-aware or the smartest lady ever, but if anything, this will be making the digital rounds before we know it. (Please be on The Soup, please be on The Soup...) The editorial actually featured gorgeous clothing (for once) and solid styling, but the stunning Greek backdrop was tuned out in favor of...Tyra sucking on Tyson Beckford's thumb and enough seizure-y editing to make Twilight: Breaking Dawn say "whoa, that's enough". I appreciated Princess Banks climbing down from her weave-constructed castle to actually interact with the girls outside of panel, but when it's to play Oprah with Angelea's unstable self or to further sexualize the girls through the use of food products, thanks but on thanks. Read More...


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