Now we’re getting somewhere (in no particular hurry). It’s Hollywood Week, and Ryan Seacrest promises it’s "sudden death," meaning the 309 remaining singers will sing a quick a capella number and Steven Tyler, Jennifer Lopez and Randy Jackson will send half of them home immediately. The way it happens in sports.
Also, and please don’t tell anyone about this, because they are playing it very close to the vest, but someone falls off the stage. Be cool about it.
The show opens with the requisite 11 minutes of the hopefuls flopping down on their hotel beds. How’s about we skip this part next year? May we just assume the singers are excited to have gotten this far? Can it be like jazz, in that this is the note you do not play? (My suspicion is that we cannot.) We do learn that sweet Phillip Phillips has never landed in a plane, as his only other airborne experience has been skydiving. I tell you, between this and Max kissing James Wolk on "Happy Endings," there are dangerous hotness levels on television tonight.
The judges address the crowd and also define themselves perfectly: Steven Tyler (which reminds me, have they cast Julianna Margulies’ mother on The Good Wife? Because I have an idea) quotes extensively from the Cowardly Lion’s "Courage" song from The Wizard of Oz. Jennifer tells the kids "Don’t let the nerves get to you," which as a performer I can tell you is the least useful thing I can imagine a person saying in this situation, until Randy opens his mouth and bellows "SEASON 11 IS ON!" I will remind you that all of these people will receive millions of dollars for what we have just seen. Read More...