Movie Review: Battleship Is Enjoyably Terrible

Critics have funny timing. They pick on The Avengers for being "cynical" when it was written and directed by a guy who loves the Marvel universe so much that he actually scripted comic books featuring the same characters — it might be the only film of its ilk that isn’t cynical. Now reviewers have turned their big guns on the board-game-inspired, Navy-versus-aliens saga Battleship, which certainly is a cynical piece of manufacturing, but it's also one of the more enjoyably terrible movies of the year — not to mention a much-needed morale booster for the Navy, which hasn’t seen much combat during our ongoing campaigns in various deserts and isolated mountain ranges. Here’s a case in which Hasbro’s interest is America’s interest.

The film is also a cautionary tale for Spielberg-sodden Pollyannas who think that when E.T. finally comes, he’ll be content with Reese’s Pieces. It opens with scientists discovering a "Goldilocks planet" in a far-off solar system which is located the proper distance from its sun to sustain life, so they promptly send out a "Whassup, homey?" signal. Bad move. Sometime later, three ships whiz past Mars and plunge into the Pacific, from which they throw up a force field as well as giant arches that appear to be the logo of a fast-food chain based on the alien bestseller, To Serve Man. Read More...


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