Well, it’s that time of year again, when hopes and dreams are smashed or taken to the next level over the course of a single audition. This… is… “The Voice”! Oh, wait…it’s the other one, right? I kid,“American Idol,” because I love.
From the get-go, it was clear “AI” was doing some serious rebranding, while at the same time, reminding everyone that they were, like, totally here first, you know? (Or wait…there was this little number. And wasn’t a certain spotlight-stealing diva formerly on that show, where she famously lost? The worm turns for thee, “Idol,” oh yes- it’s kismet, I tell you!)
Still, the numbers are undeniably impressive: 200 million records sold (most frightening factoid of the night: so has Mariah, single-handedly!), 371 #1 hits… you get the idea. But that’s not why you came, is it? Oh no, you came for the showdown in diva town, right? Well, if you did, you could not have possibly been more richly rewarded. After the internet nearly self-immobilized when Nicki Minajthreatened to go all Brooklyn on Mariah’s booty, expectations were high that this iteration of “AI” would be something to see, a vertible celebrity death match. Boy, was there ever!