Two and a Half Men Season 7, Episode 9 Recap: "Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair"


This week on Two and a Half Men, Charlie realizes that the heat has gone out of their sex life when Chelsea no longer screams "Ga" during sex (apparently, when she's finishing she can't get out the whole "God"). That's not too surprising, considering that they've been together for a while now. What is surprising are the people he'll turn to for advice.


Chelsea is stressed lately with work, her parents, and planning the wedding. She's so stressed, that she has stopped having orgasms. That doesn't sit too well with Charlie, though he's not sure what's worse--that she's not been having them, or that she told him. Chelsea tries to comfort him by explaining that she's just had a lot on her mind lately and that she still loves him and blah, blah, blah. She ends up comforting him right to sleep. Yes, she's a lucky, lucky girl.


In an effort to restore the passion, Charlie decides to actually woo Chelsea with dinner, candles, and the whole romance thing. While he's preparing for a special evening, Jake is preparing for a date of his own. On the advice of Uncle Charlie, he eats before the date so that he won't be grabbing fries off of his girlfriend's plate. That's not the only advice Uncle Charlie has given him. Apparently, Jake was also told to wear clean underwear on a date. Now, I get that you should wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident, but to imply that Jake needs clean ones in case he gets lucky is a little unnerving. Maybe it's the mother coming out in me but I think he's just too young!! Of course, he does have some of Evelyn and Charlie's blood, so I guess it's to be expected.


Charlie is desperate to fix the speed bump in his relationship so he asks Berta for sex advice. She tells him that doing it in public is a sure-fire way to bring the spark back. When asked if she ever did that, Charlie is then warned not to enter the garage if the Sparkle's truck is in the driveway - nice visual. Even more desperate for some advice, he seeks out his brother for a talk. He finds Alan preparing for his own date (for him it involves dancing around in his tighty-whiteys and using a special formulated hair-like substance). Yes, Alan has resorted to using Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair. Although it's not the best solution, he needs to keep using it until the (non-FDA approved) pills kick in. Charlie would caution against it, but who is he to condemn someone for their choice of pharmaceuticals? It turns out to be a bad time to ask Alan for anything!


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