'The Real Housewives of New York' premiere recap: New alliances, accusations of Countlessness

How I've missed New York. The new season began with some good-natured kvetching, as Jill warned that there had better be something to nibble on aboard the yacht. Ramona, wiggling like a fish in her little bikini and declaring herself a doppelganger of Cameron Diaz with her cute new haircut, welcomed the women onto her yacht. 'You wish!' said Jill, who then scrutinized Ramona's flushed face, looking for evidence of recent nips and tucks. Ramona told us that her verbally abusive father passed away five months ago and she is thereby experiencing a season of total renewal. New beginnings, inside and out. So when Alex clopped on board, Ramona jumped into her arms with only a passing shot about only girls allowed. (Back in the city, Simon diligently whacked a tennis ball against a wall, desperately hoping for a rematch and additional screen time.)

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